Oh Steve Urkel, you lovable klutz. Probably one of the most famous TGIF quotes I could find (unless everyone is more versed in Uncle Jesse’s hair products), Steve Urkel was definitely a favorite character of mine, in Family Matters and the million guest spots he did on basically every other TGIF show. How was everyone, spread all over the country, friends with this doofus? Maybe they all met when every single TGIF show went to Disney World? Did they all hang out with the ever-classier Stefan Ur-kel too? Oh, the questions.
Maybe the reason I liked Steve so much is because I, too, am a major klutz.
It is a wonder I have never broken a single bone. I’ve sprained my ankle more times than I can count — one time in middle school was so bad that I stretched out ever single ligament at once. How does that even happen?! It was so stretchy that it didn’t even really swell, which is how it took a week and a few more falls for me to end up at the doctor. They wouldn’t even give me crutches because I apparently set off such horrendous klutz-radar alerts that they figured I wouldn’t be able to maneuver them and would just make it worse.
So basically I had to hop around school for a few weeks. Because that isn’t lame at all…
You’d think I would eventually get over this little “awkward phase” but no, not really. Bruises still miraculously show up on a near daily basis, in places that don’t make any logical sense. I have zero explanation for what I’m bumping into that causes little bruises on the back of my KNEES. Apparently I sit too forcefully. Or something.
The best though, is what happened at the end of the work day on Wednesday:
My leg felt a little tingly, like “oh maybe it’s kind of starting to go to sleep” but it didn’t feel all that bad, so I stood up. I went to take a step, however, when my ankle rolled. This is no huge issue, unless your leg muscles aren’t working BECAUSE YOUR LEG IS ASLEEP, and you can’t autocorrect the ankle roll. What happens from here is you over-correct, then re-roll and collapse on the floor in a giant heap. Luckily only one other person was here, and I was laughing so hard that there was no need for concern. But still: